Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
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