If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
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So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
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She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
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