I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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