i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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