I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
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