Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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