We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
