Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Send help, water and tortillas.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
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