so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
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When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
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I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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