sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Screwed.edu
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OPIZZABONMYDICK
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize