Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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