i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
