i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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