you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
