He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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