Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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