last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Farmville is her only friend.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
Randomize