what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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