plz talk dirty to me
I bet he comes in French.
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize