They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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