I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
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