I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
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