I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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