She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
