btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
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Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
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Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
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