when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Quick, to the slutcave!
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
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