I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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