What did we do last night that was yellow?
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
