He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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