How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
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