at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
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How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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