someone threw a dead crab at me
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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