they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
