but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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