It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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