walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
