how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
