But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Randomize
