Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Randomize
