u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
where are you?
Hypothermia
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize
