It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
