Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
