She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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