Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
