Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
