yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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