Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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