umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
She bit a glass in half.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I want to fling myself into the sun
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
