Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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