After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Randomize